So, it’s been around a month and a half since Alexa and I were officially boyfriend and girlfriend. So far, we’ve spent the entire time apart, and while I’m pretty confident that the next time we see eachother (whenever that may be) will be rewarding, in the meantime it’s…difficult.
The problem for me is that I show affection through physical means. I like to cuddle. I like to give hugs. I like kissing. I like wrapping my arms around the waist of the girl I’m dating. So you can see why the time apart is frustrating for me.
On the 8th of March she leaves for basic training for the Air Force, and she’ll be gone for two months. After that she gets to pick where she’s stationed. I’m personally hoping she’ll try to get stationed somewhere within visitable distance, so then we’ll actually be able to see eachother once in a while.
I guess the problem is that right now I’m feeling lonely. I’m currently living with a married couple, and seeing them together…it just makes me miss Alexa even more. It doesn’t help that I’m used to being in a relationship where my significant other was within reasonable distance, and the only thing that would keep us apart was scheduling problems (which was part of the reasoning behind the breakup there). It doesn’t help that I don’t have consistant contact with Alexa either (again, something I’m used to from previous relationships). She doesn’t have a phone, and she checks her Facebook maybe a couple times a week, making it hard to message eachother on there.
I’m still going to remain loyal to her. Only a complete jerk would cheat on their significant other. But that doesn’t stop me from sometimes feeling like I’m still single, and having to occasionally remind myself that I’m in a relationship. It’s extremely frustrating, especially since the temptation is there, and I really hate that it even exists. I know that next time I see her all of that will be wiped away, and everything will be fine. But it’s going to be a while until I see her again.
Ugh, I’m rambling again. I guess I still feel like I’m a little screwed up inside, but I get the feeling I’m always going to be that way.
1 year ago • 0 notes